Hello friends!
It has been much too long since I last wrote a blog. Much has happened. Much has been experienced. But I think if I attempted to tell you about everything, my posts would start just becoming an itinerary of my days. An itinerary that would fill several blogs. So, I am not going to fill you in on ALL the stories that happen here (and this way you have a good reason to come and visit me when I get back, to hear all the stories and see all the pictures of the many things that I have not included here).
One of the questions I am often asked by friends and family from home is, "What have you been doing?" To those of us with North American bred minds, this is a perfectly legitimate question since we have this insatiable desire to do, to produce, to meet deadlines, conquer, succeed. But here, doing isn't regarded nearly as highly as just being. Being with someone, being available, being free to just sit down and talk. So, looking back on my time thus far (nearly a month) I also ask myself, "What have I done?" Answer: Not much.
Maybe "doing" isn't the point. I came in here with guns blazing, expecting to "do" great things for the Kingdom. I expected to have certain tasks, certain responsibilities, certain things that I could check off my list to appease my task centered mind. But I have found my structured lists afloat in a sea of unstructuredness. Afloat with no hope of finding anything that resembles "do" floating alongside it to which it might attach itself and gain some sort of validity. This week found myself longing intensely for some sort of physical labor, so that I could look back and see what I had accomplished.
In my naivety, I came here to "do mnistry" but have instead found myself just living. Just living as minister. Is that 'doing ministry?" Is that ministry? Living without stucture and appointments and meetings (ok, well not completely devoid of these things, but mostly). What is ministry? Is it preaching a sermon? Is it visiting the sick? Is it spending time with friends? Is it playing cricket? Is it reading the Word? Hmm, I don't know. My checklist mind keeps trying to compartmentalize all these things so that I can be "efficient" in "doing ministry." My mind is consistently blown by the way that cultures wire you to think certain ways.
I realize that this in not a particularly profound post. I realize it is not really put together that well. I apologize for its seeming lack-lustre, especially since it is the first post in a long while. I can't comprehend these things. I wonder if it is even worth trying to comprehend them. I wonder if maybe my desire to understand everything is causing me to miss out on some things that just need to be experienced. Not understood. Not concepts to be conquered, but simply things to live. Faith like a child. Trust in the Father. Not needing to understand, just knowing that He is good and he will take care.
Hopefully my next post won't be so disjointed.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
I think Jesus would like to play cricket. I bet he would be good too.
Dave, I loved this post. I think it was profound - and I'm really thankful that you're learning some of the lessons NOW that I've just recently been learning - at my advanced age!!!
Ministry is so much more than "doing" - often times it is just "being" with those we're "ministering to"...
Can't wait to hear more about what God's teaching you when you get home!
Deb
Hey Dave,
I like what you said here. I often get frustrated with all the doing that I have to accomplish to be part of ministry here in N.A. Meetings and pick-ups and planning and decorations and shopping and what feels like time wasted on things, not people. Are these things necessary? Maybe for the style of ministry I was adopted into. But maybe it is time for a change. Time to find a way to "do" ministry with less "doing." I'll have to think about that some more.
Post a Comment